United States Arranges for Return of Statue of Liberty to France

Back in the late 1800s some dude in France decided that America was worthy of a gift of Liberty to enlighten the World. Those arriving in the United States looked to the Statue and held a belief that they could prove their worth in America, or, otherwise, escape the perils of the Country they were coming from.

“Today, the Statue of Liberty is returning to France, ok. We are going to break it down, put it in boxes, and tell them to take it back,” President Trump said in a tweet, intermingling fluidly the announcement on the Statue with his tweets enraged about Harley Davidson. “And, France is going to pay for the shipping costs, believe me.”

Many in America were taken aback at the announcement. Sure, people thought, America at the moment does not embody the ideals of the Statue, but, it seems like kind of an arduous ordeal to remove the entire Statue. Stephen Miller addressed this in a memo on the policy choice:

Many people from the World around look at Lady Liberty in a way that disgusts me. They think of the Statue as a sign of Hope. That America is a place that will be accepting, tolerant. Tell me, why would we want the poor? We work hard as a country to already establish that many of our people are poor. The tired? The huddled masses? The masses are tired and huddled for a reason. Because they are not winners, as Mr. Trump would say. Send us homeless? How dare you.

Today, we say no more.

The decision comes on the same day that the Supreme Court upheld the Muslim Travel Ban instituted in 2017 by Donald Trump and on the heels of Trump’s proclamation of giving zero fucks about due process as it relates to those seeking Asylum in America.

Sarah Huckabee Sanders was not available for comment as she was fielding phone calls from Irish and Italian Restaurants canceling reservations she may or may not have set. But, fortunately, the President does not stop ranting and had more comments:

“Believe me, did we need this thing? Have you been to it? It’s ugly. If we are going to have a Lady welcome people to New York, believe me, she needs to be gorgeous, ok. And this Statue?”

“woof woof” chimed in former Trump Campaign Manager Corey Lewandowski.

“So, now, we get rid of this eyesore and the people know they can’t come here anymore, ok. you come here and you’re back on the boat, believe me. but, the boats you go home in will be massive, gorgeous beautiful yachts. not those little boats you see people coming up from cuba in, ok. And, France will pay for that, too.”